Treking in the woods.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

It is about time!

Well, it has been a very long, long, long time since I have felt like a could write anything down on here. I don't even know that I could begin to explain it to anyone or to myself why but I will get back to writing and hopefully getting my emotions back on an even keel.
It has been a long stressful year in more ways than I even like to admit to myself. From last July when Dad first got sick and we all went to the hospital in Lincoln, Nebraska. Then the hearing of my intended move of my very, very dear friend, Chris. Then I had a scary ambulance ride to the hospital thinking I was having a heart attack. Turned out to be a problem with my stomach, gastro parisis, took me a bunch of tests and bucks later to find out what it was. I have been feeling somewhat better there if I do not go over board on things that I eat. Chris went and moved away on me. All the way to Ohio, at least she could have chosen a place closer to home. To be truthful about it I am missing her terribly but I am very happy for her and Gene. She is happy and that is all that counts.
Winter was long and cold. We spent about 2 and half weeks in Minnesota with the kids and had a real nice time. Went and cut a tree, watched Sam put on the lights, many many lights. It was an awesome tree. Christy and I made cookies, candy and food lots of food. We had a ton of fun and miss them terribly.
Let me see what else went bad. Erin and I relastionship went south for a long while. We have not yet gotten it back on track. I have resigned myself to something different. I will take what I can get and not be spiteful of what I can not have. I will not ask anything of her. I am very careful to take what she is willing to give me and be happy with it. I think it makes Erin happy but it is difficult for me. Enough said about that.
I did get to go to a school in Joliet, Ill. Jason and Sam came and picked me up there and I got to spend 2 nights with them. Jason and I drove down to Dads place in Palmer, Nebraska then spent 4 days cleaning out most of the stuff we wanted from there. What a hard thing that was to do. Going through someones life piece by piece. Trying to decided what was good and what was not worth keeping. I still do not know if we kept what we should have and got rid of what we should have. Putting some ones life into a bunch of boxes. I have promised myself I would not put my kids through that very thing.
Jason spent a couple of weeks here with us. He worked on our transmission, and got our truck running like a dream. He is a very good mechanic and takes a lot of pride in what he has accomplished. I miss him so much, he thought it would be easy leaving Idaho and moving so far away. He did not think he needed his parents in close contact with his life. I miss my boys too. I get scared that the older they get the less time they will want to spend with us. Sam is pretty close to his Grandpa and that is good. He calls here at least once a week. He cracks me up with some of the things he says and what he makes reference to. He has a great sense of humor and is a funny guy.
In April we four of us were able to meet and go to our home town, Twin Falls, Idaho. Carol, Teri, Connie and myself spent a week walking through the past. It was so much fun to go to the places we remembered as kids. From the South Hills, to the past home of Claude and Ella Bryant. They are cousins of Moms and were a big part of our childhood lives. We drove out to where Loren and Louise Partin lived in the couple of different locations, drove right up to the Ward place where we lived and where Connie was a baby. We hunted aspergras and made it for dinner the same night. It was fantastic, it tasted so very good and it was so much fine walking along the ditch banks finding the tender shoots that made dinner an absolute delight. We went to quilt shops, had Doris our cousin from Elko meet us for lunch then went to Teri's to visit for awhile. Doris is in such pain over the death of her mother. Especially sence it was at the hands of her sister, Teresa. Lucy was unfortunately unable to join us and I for one sure did miss her being there. It was not quite the same and I hope it is the last time that will happen. We are already planning our next trip. I hope we will all be able to be together in Sister, Oregon next year. Then maybe the next year we can all go to Minnesota. I am not sure Teri will be able to go as she is always so short of funds. But that is not my problem and I will not make it mine as I have done so in the past.
Well I have rambled on and on for long enough for now and need to get this posted. I am feeling better about all this. I pray every day for all Lord Jesus has given me. From my life with Richard, my parents, my sisters and extended family. My home and all that goes with my life I would not have any part of it any other way. Every morning and every night I thank God for what I have.

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